Refleksi Minda

Let’s get one thing clear. I love food and I love eating. I can’t help it, but I actually look forward to my lunches and dinners, I enjoy deliberating over where and what will be my next meal. Few things a more enjoyable than a healthy helping of food at dinner, in my humble opinion.

It may surprise you, however, to know that Ramadhan is quite possibly my favorite time of the year. Even more so than Syawal (Aidilfitri), perhaps. Sure, during Ramadan I would have to fast during the day. Sure, during this month, restraint is something which should be practiced. And truthfully, I think even the strongest of persons will feel their stomach growling when they see someone eating in front of them while their fasting.

But in spite of these ‘difficulties’, I love this holy month. Last year I posted this on the bulletin board:

I always loved Ramadhan. Yeah, it’s true, I have to fast during the day, not eating nor drinking, yet to me it is one of the most wonderful times of the year. Personally, I think it is better than Syawal, even though that month is ‘Hari Raya time’. Ramadhan has it’s own feel, it’s own atmosphere that makes it much more special than other months in the Muslim calender.

To me, in Ramadhan, everything seems extra special. The people seem friendlier, food tastes better, drinks seem to quench thirst better. At night, when the stars litter the sky, those celestial bodies seem to glitter a little brighter. The wind seems to blow a little gentler, a little more soothing, a little more calming. And when everyone is asleep and everywhere there is only silence, I feel that there is an added serenity and tranquility that is absent normally. It is during such times that I feel His presence, and I feel closer to my Creator than ever before.

I always tell my non-Muslim friends that Ramadhan is more than a month of not drinking and fasting. It is in fact a month of restrain, where Muslims indulge less in the things that they normally take for granted, like food and drinks, and be grateful for the bounty that God has given us. We are to remember those who are less lucky than us and be thankful. A month long physical and mental exercise, where worldly desires take second seat to religious spirituality.

Yes, spirituality. After a year of waste, of indulgence, of excess, of thanklessness, of sin, the magic of Ramadhan results in Muslims feeling the urge to get closer to his Creator all of a sudden. After one whole year of taking Him for granted, it seems suddenly some Muslims woke up and remembered Him.

I am speaking for myself as well. Although I am a God-fearing person, I do not consume alcohol, I eat only halal food, I do not gamble and I do not commit adultery, I am far from being an ardent or pious Muslim. Far too often, I distance myself from him (usually involuntarily), although He has never ever abandoned me. Being the human that I am, i turn to him only when in need. And also being the human that I am, after writing all this, I cannot guarantee that I will change. Is it fated that we are always to repeat our mistakes, even though we realise them and regret them? It is a measure of His love towards us that he never closes his door towards us, and always willing to forgive those who seek repentance.

I suppose that is the reason that He is the Almighty, and that we are but one of His Creations.

I doubt if during any other time of the year I would be thinking about all this. It is only during this blessed month that I start to explore deeply my own religious spirituality.

I am thankful that I have reached another year’s Ramadan. Which means that I was given a whole year’s worth of chance to change for the better. Have I changed for the better at all? I don’t know, I cannot answer such a question for certain. What is certain that while I still do not consume alcohol, commit adultery, gamble and eat non-halal food, I still am not the most pious and ardent Muslim around. It is quite likely that nothing has changed in terms of my religious spirituality at all. What a shame.

Lincoln’s Inn

I was in London during the weekend, attending an introductory weekend at my Inns of Court, Lincoln’s. It was a weekend affair, starting on Friday night and ending on Saturday night. The highlight of the event was the two dinners on Friday and Saturday night, while the day was filled with talks from important people about semi-important topics.

In any case, I enjoyed the dinners. It was held in a great big hall, with stained glass windows and a huge painting facing you on the front wall. The sides of the hall was filled with pictures of prominent Lincoln Inn’s members, as well as various emblems. It’s an awesome site, and especially at dinner time, when the place is arrayed with long tables and chairs, lit with candles.

The purpose of these dinings mainly is for you to be able to talk to other people, not just other students of the course, but also barristers, judges and even the wife of the UK prime minister (Yes, Mrs. Blair is from Lincoln’s Inn and she dined with us on Friday). I got the opportunity to sit next to a barrister on Friday, he’s been called to the Bar for 13 years, and on Saturday, I sat in between a Malaysian and a Pakistani. I had good conversations on both dinners.

It was a very friendly and informal atmosphere. On Saturday, for example, right after breaking my fast with a glass of orange juice, I was approached out of nowhere by a barrister, and after inquiring my nationality, started talking about his holiday in Malaysia some years ago. I must admit however that I was hoping that he’ll go away so that I can get some more orange juice to quench my thirst. He did, after a while.

All in all, although I did not enjoy the talks on Saturday (most likely due to the fact that I was tired, thirsty and hungry), it was a wonderful weekend. The grandeur of the whole thing, the place, the people, makes me feel proud that I will soon be a part of this honourable profession.

Blessed be thee in this holy month

Lastly, I’d just like to wish all Muslims a ‘Selamat Berpuasa’, with hopes that the light of this blessed of months shine brightly upon you.

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